Broken Angel
by bailey-fabrixboutafray
Summary: There was always somthing different and special about Zahrah's new friend Ellie, and then when Zahrah meets Ellie's brother, Alexander, she realizes there is more to them than she could ever imagine.
1. Prologue

hey lovely peoples! its me! ok so... yeah this isn't "with the shadows of a fallen world" but i think you will reconize a few charactors ; P lol but yeah its not really a "sequel" but it is connected to "with the twinkling of the infinite stars" i hope you guys like it! heres the prologue lol the first chapter might take a few days lol sorry! lol! ok well REVIEW

WATCH ME BLEED

keep it real

"C"-T-(R)

Baileyzzzzzzzzz

* * *

Prologue

He climbed the mountain

Tall and steep

With a promise the wind

Just couldn't keep

He stepped here

And his footstepped there

The breeze blowing through

His jet-black hair

His hand slipped away

And his body fell

Where was he going?

It wasn't to hell

He lay on the ground

His mind fading out

His heart was slowing

There wasn't a doubt

He was still for moments

Then he left the white shores

He was again on Earth

But a little something more

* * *

what are you going to do now? OH YEAH! REVIEW! ; P (please?) 


	2. Chapter 1

here guys! i hope ya like it! review please! sorry it kind of short... : S lol

WATCH ME BLEED

keep it real

"C"-T-(R)

Baileyzzzzzzz

* * *

Chapter One

It was a big school full of a lot of people. So when I was greeted by a new face in the lunch room I wasn't surprised. I hadn't gotten a lunch so the space before me was covered in text books and study guides. There was no way I was failing the science test again.

"Hello, is anyone sitting here?" I was met with a sweet voice, black hair, and the most astonishing purple eyes. I looked up her a little dazed at those eyes. Her hair was in a loose ponytail at her neck, and I noted her hair covered her ears. It was black with a few hints of red here and there. It was a stoning contrast with her porcelain skin. She was in front of me and I moved all my stuff shaking my head.

"No, no ones sitting there."

"Do you mind if I?" she asked.

"Of course not!" I smiled friendly at her as she sat down. I shot my hand out to her, "So what's your name?"

"Lilly," she said sweetly but didn't shake my hand. "What's yours?"

"Zahrah," I answered looking down. My name was pretty I guess but I was always embarrassed of it. No one could ever really say it right and I always felt bad.

Her eyes widened at and she smiled, "Wow, that's pretty."

I laughed nervously. "Yeah, I've got lots of Indian in my blood and my parents thought it'd be neat to give me an authentic name." Her body stiffened slightly, but noticeably, at the word blood for a reason I couldn't pin point.

"Oh, yeah? Well that's cool," she said, nodding at me.

"Thanks. So did you just move here?" I asked her.

"Yep. Today's my first day." She perked up a little.

"Cool! Do you like it so far?"

She laughed a little and shrugged, "It's only been about four hours, but sure!" We both giggled in that girly way.

"Yeah I've lived here my whole life," I said. "Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

"A brother. He's a sophomore too. He starts in a few days, though. So,he's not here yet."

"Yeah…"

We both looked away from the other and it got a little awkward.

"How about you?" she asked suddenly.

"Have any siblings? An older brother, who's a senior, and a younger brother, a freshman," I informed her.

"The only girl then, well besides mom I guess," she laughed.

I knew she was just trying to make friends. And I knew she was just trying to be nice, but at the mention of my mother I looked away. I felt the tears coming on and that wasn't good. I'd just met her and I was going to look crazy. Great.

She tilted her head at me and her brow scrunched. "Is something wrong?" she asked. All I could do was shake my head no.

She looked down, "I'm sorry," she whispered apologetically.

Thankfully no tears fell, but it was close. I put my hands on my face to try and cool my cheeks. Then I looked at her and tried to smile. "No, no its ok. I'm… I'm fine."

Something her eyes told me she didn't believe me, but she didn't press it. And neither did I.

It turns out she was in all my classes after lunch. We hung out the rest of the day and when it came time to leave, weboth headed for the parking lot. Our cars were right next to each other. My '90 Chevrolet Blazer looked so incredibly old and dirty next to her brand new, beautiful, black Lexus. My brothers both had drool running down their chins. I probably did too.

"Well I'll see you later, Zahrah," she said waving to me and smiling at my brothers.

"Yeah, see you tomorrow!" I said laughing and waving back as she drove out of the parking lot. I got into the passenger seat and my brothers shrugged in the car also. I tried to keep down my laughter.

Zeke, my older brother, flipped down his mirror and rubbed his face.

"That was a beautiful car," Zac, my younger bother, breathed in the back seat.

"Yeah, it sure was," Zeke said.

I just looked at both of them and laughed harder.

He started the car and pulled out.

Zac leaned into the front of the car a little and looked at me. "Do you know that girl?"

"Yeah she just moved here, so today was her first day. Her names Lilly," I said. "She's got a brother, but he doesn't start till Wednesday."

"Does she have a boyfriend?" Zeke asked even before I was done saying Wednesday. Zac looked over at him and scowled. Zeke kept his eyes on the road and acted like he hadn't seen it.

"How should I know? And either way, I am _not_ asking her for you," I laughed at them both. I looked down at Zac's hopeful expression. I tapped his forehead in the childish way I know he hates. "Or for you.

"Besides, I don't think she wants a guy who will just love her for her car."

Zeke puffed his broad chest out a bit. "I'd love her for other reasons."

"Or her looks," I challenged back, and we started laughing. Zac on the other hand was sulking in the back seat again.

"Well you only are friends with her because she has a brother," he shot out hatefully.

"Zac shut up," Zeke said shaking his head. "Z doesn't even know her broth-" then he stopped and shot a worried glance down at me.

Mom used to call me Z.

Zeke hadn't slipped up for a whole year.

I looked out the window. The fun, playful mood of the car took a diving plunge.

He reached over and touched my arm. I looked back at both of them and smiled. It was a little smile, but it was still there. "It's ok guys."

"I'm real sorry, Zahrah. I didn't mean to, seriously," he rushed.

"Oh, of course not, I know you didn't. And you can call me Z if you want to." I tried to keep that smile in place, but I faded. I shrugged, looking out the window again, "I mean… dad still does."

"Dad doesn't know anything," Zac sighed back into his seat.

We didn't talk all the rest of the way home. And we all knew Zac was right.

* * *

reveiw! 


	3. Chapter 2

hey peeps! yeah so i changed Lilly's apperance so heres what i changed, just to let y'all know lol ; )

"Hello, is anyone sitting here?" I was met with a sweet voice, blonde hair, and the most astonishing green eyes. I looked up at her, a little dazed by those eyes. Her hair was in a loose ponytail at her neck, and I noted her hair covered her ears. The blonde blended nicely with her porcelain skin. She was in front of me and I moved all my stuff shaking my head.

hmmmmm now is that familiar? -ponders-

ok well pleeeeeeeease review guys! please!

WATCH ME BLEED

keep it real

"C"-T-(R)

Baileyzzzzzzz

* * *

Chapter Two

The boys were at the table watching the game and I was making dinner with dad got home.

"Hello, beautiful family!" he said perky.

The boys just waved to him without taking their eyes from the television. He put his arm around my waist and kissed the top of my head.

"And how's Z today?" he asked looking down at the food.

"Fine, I'm fine," I replied smiling.

Then, he walked over to the table and took a seat.

_How came a painting be beautiful if one entire section is left white?_ I thought in the safety of my own broken heart. I was going to use it in a poem or something.

"What's on today sons?" dad asked trying to start a conversation. I sighed heavily and just before I turned back around to the food, Zeke turned and gave me a sympathetic, knowing look. I tried to smile back at him, but he didn't believe or push it, and he understood.

Unlike most broken, divided families, in this one, the kids all stick together. I love my brothers more than anything. And not saying that I don't love my dad and I even love my mom, so much, but there's just something that Zeke and Zac understand that my dad just can't seem to. They know what it's like to be on the inside and feel so crowded. Yet at the same time to feel on the outside and so alone.

Dad doesn't know. And refuses to believe. And maybe we're all a little envious of that. I don't know…

Zac started explaining the game and even though I know all about football, what's the only girl to do, I wasn't paying attention. I was trying, and very hard, to concentrate on dinner. But spaghetti doesn't really call forth that much articulation.

Soon it was done and eaten and we all said our good nights. My room, a computer room, and a bathroom were the only rooms on the second level. I started to climb the stairs and entered my room. I flopped on my bed a kicked of my tattered, puma tennis shoes. I pulled my hair out of the ponytail and looked straight up into no where.

I tried thinking of normal everyday things. I'd see Lilly again tomorrow. That'd be fun. And on Wednesday maybe I'd meet her brother. I tried to push away the other feelings I was having, telling myself they didn't matter and that they could wait.

But that was stupid. And that was wrong. I didn't matter? My mom didn't matter? Maybe that's why she was gone, because she felt she didn't matter…. But once again, I don't know.

Finally after a very long time I fell asleep.

I woke up with that annoying beeping sound coming from my alarm clock. I meant to just turn it off, but I slammed my hand to hard and knocked everything off my table. Today was probably going to be a hard day.

I got up and put on some clothes. Even though the jeans looked nice on my womanly figure and even though the t-shirt was tight and accented my curves beautifully I shrugged on a hoodie, hiding it all from the cruel world. I went into my bathroom to wash my face and put on my makeup.

I looked exactly like my mother. I had the same Indian, tanned skin, the same brown hair. It wasn't _dark_ dark, but not really light brown either. I had the same long face and neck, same plump lips, but I remember hers were bigger. The only difference was our eyes. She had had smaller, squinty gray eyes. Mine were large, round, and a deep brown. I applied a layer of eye liner and mascara making them even more dark and beautiful.

Everything in this mirror reminded me of her. I hated it. Hated it. So I tried and centered on my eyes. They were mine, my own. Just Zahrah. _And just because you look like her doesn't mean you are her,_ my hope whispered to me.

My hair was layered so when I put my hair up in my usual ponytail, the top few layers fell out. And I liked that. It gave my hair the look that I'd had my hair up for some time when really I hadn't.

I cupped those hairs behind my ears and walked down stairs. I entered the living room and the boys were all ready. Zeke looked at me and laughed, it was Zac's hoodie. One he'd gotten for being on the swim team. It was already too big for him so it looked ridiculously large on me. But Zeke was laughing because I had my own sweatshirts, but I had chosen to wear Zac's just to burn his grits. (And for other reasons, but Zeke didn't really know, or care to know, about those)

"Sis! Come on! Go get your own!" he wined to me.

"Were you planning on wearing this today?" I asked sticking my nose up at him. Yeah, his 6 foot 2 inches stature would be scary to someone else with my 5 foot 4 inch stature, but I wasn't intimidating at all.

"No I wasn't," he said through clenched teeth.

"Then may I please wear it?" I smiled at him, I'd already won.

"We're gonna be late, whatever." And with that he walked on past me and out the door, Zeke giving me a high five. We both knew it was mean to pick on the baby, but we did it anyway.

We piled into the car, in the same seats as yesterday; Zeke at the wheel, me in the passenger, and Zac sulking in the back. After about 10 minutes of silence Zeke spoke up.

"Oh lighten up, dude. We only pick on you because we love you," he said smiling over his shoulder.

"Why don't you love me by wearing your own hoodie?" he said looking out the window.

"It's just a hoodie," I said.

"Then wear your own!" He was getting angry now and it was annoying.

"No," I said simply. We were quiet the rest of the way.

We pulled into a space and Zac muttered under his breath, "Whatever," and slammed his door. I grimaced after his retreating body and stuck my tongue out in a not so attractive way.

"Why did you want to wear that anyway?" Zeke asked looking at him walk away also.

"Because I did."

"That's not that great of an answer Zahrah." He said looking in my eyes.

"What does it matter? I wanted to wear a sweatshirt, I found this one first, what's the problem?" and I opened my door and stalked out too. As much and I wanted to let him in I didn't want to. It didn't matter, really.

I was on my way to lunch and the halls were full of loud, smelly, people all pushing and shoving. Everyone going to the same place, but everyone somewhere different. The star football player, you know the type, was walking why with his gang of followers, tossing everyone aside who got in their way. One of them shoved right into me, sending me to hit against the lockers and fall to the ground.

And in the chaos of all the school hall way I saw a snow white hand reach out to me. I looked up to the owner of the hand and saw the most amazing, china blue eyes I had ever seen in my entire life.

* * *

hope you like it: D review! (sorry its soshort : S) 


	4. Chapter 3

hey guys! sorry its been a while and story again this chapter is kind of short... and sorry but it might be a while before the next chapter comes but i think of y'all and love ya! oh and sorry i keep changing stuff but also i changed Lilly's name to Ellie... and kiwi i hope you're not mad hahah! for real...but because of who her parents are (which you know but are not going to tell anyone! lol!) butbc of them i changed her name... lol it will make sense i promise lol ok well LOTS OF LOVE! review PLEEEEEEEASE!

WATCH ME BLEED

keep it real

"C"-T-(R)

Baileyzzzzzzzzz

* * *

Chapter Three

I looked down at his hand again as I took it. It was freezing, ice cold. But I didn't care, or notice really. I looked at our hands; his porcelain, snow white hand cupped around my dark, burnt colored one.

"Are you alright?" he asked in one very attractive, low voice. My eyes snapped back up to his face and he lifted me from the floor. He had a black, curly shag. He had to have had the most amazingly face I'd even seen. The look of an angel. His jaw was square and strong looking. His lips full and appealing. His eyes were perfectly shaped, wide and round without being deer-in-headlights wide. But the true beauty in his face was the color his eyes; crystal, moonlight blue. They were so intense, but so soft and caring.

He seemed truly concerned for my well being and seemed to be getting anxious because I hadn't answered yet. He bent his face closer to mine, putting his other hand on the top of mine, and asked again, "Are you alright?"

His close proximity and the smell of his glorious breath didn't help me answer. I quickly shook my head and looked down at the floor, suddenly confused. I looked back at him and said, "Yeah, yeah I'm fine, thanks." His hands were still wrapped around mine and something in my heart wanted him to never let go. He smiled a subtle, but radiant smile and straightened back up. He took his hands away from mine. He looked around and so did I. There was no one left in the hall, but us.

He let out a low laugh and smiled back at me.

"I guess it's just us, huh… I'm Alexander, but you can call me Alic," he declared, shooting his hand out at me again.

"Yeah, ha, and thanks again! I'm Zahrah," I said.

"Zahrah… that's pretty," he said grinning down at me. But I blushed and looked away. _You're face is really pretty_, I thought to myself.

"Were you planning on going to lunch or you like just sitting in the hallway?" he muttered playfully.

"Oh right! Lunch…" I turned from him and started walking in the direction of the cafeteria.

He easily caught up with me and looked down at me, sideways, still walking, "Mind if I tag along?"

"Nope," I said smiled up at him.

First I'd looked like an idiot falling in the hall. Then he still reaches down and offers me a hand up. Then he makes absolutely sure I'm not injured. And now he wants to eat lunch with me? Was this dude for real?

We got to the doors and he even opened it for me. _Seriously, if this is a dream_, don't you dare _wake me up._ I walked in and saw Ellie sitting at the table we'd dined in yesterday. I rose my hand and was about to call out to her when Alic said something first.

"That girls over there, with the blonde hair, that's my sister Ellie, yesterday was her first day," he informed pointed to her.

"Oh yeah? You're sister? And yeah I know her, we hung out yesterday."

"Oh cool, then." He started walking over to her and said her name. She looked up from her book and at us.

"Well I see you two have already met," she said- smiling- motioning for us to sit down.

He scooted in fast and then I sat. My knee clashed softly with his leg and I gave him an apologetic look. He just smiled and nodded sheepishly in return.

"So you guys are siblings?" I asked looking close at both of them. They looked nothing at all a like.

"Yep," Alexander answered quick and swift. I just nodded.

I looked out the window and the rain was pouring from the sky. It was beautiful… I noticed one tree that was old and leafless, swaying in the wind at a deadly arch. Poor tree would over today before the clouds let up.

Lunch passed by and Alic went to his class and Ellie and I to ours. I had to use the rest room and told her I'd meet her in the classroom.

I looked out the window and saw the rain again. I knew it was wrong, and a bad idea, but the moister called to me. I thought for a moment of the kind of trouble I'd get into. Not much, some, but not much. I was also risking Ellie getting angry because I really wouldn't really show up to class. Then I swore the rain called me by name. So I went for it.

I opened and walked out the front doors. I pulled my hair down from the ponytail and took off my, well Zac's, hoodie off and my shoes off. I left all those things in the cover of the overhang.

I stepped out into the downpour, instantly drenched to the core. Wow it felt amazing. More amazing then I ever thought it would. Soon my anxiety and stress melted away and I found myself dancing the rain. I went out behind the school, afraid the ladies in the office would see me if I stayed in the front yard. The mud and green felt amazing against my bear feet and I quashed around.

I hid behind a large tree and began looking through the windows of the classrooms there were here in the back. I saw through the cafeteria and saw Zeke eating and laughing with his friends. Then I felt as though someone was looking at me and that was not a good thing. I looked through another window and saw Alic staring right at me with wide eyes. I smiled and winked at him. If his eyes could have gotten any bigger they did. But then they looked excited. I waved him towards me and his eye brows shot up. I nodded vigorously. He raised his hand and the teacher called on him. He said something to her and she nodded politely. He was then out of the room.

I pulled away from the tree and stood in the open rain. I saw that dieing tree and felt bad for it again.

"I know the feeling, buddy," I whispered sadly looking at it. I turned back around and looked up to see Alexander a good three yards away, soaked as well. He looked at me as if to say, _I can't believe you're making me do this_. But I just smiled hugely at him and did a little spin.

When I was back facing him he had and a frightened expression on his face. I heard a large crack coming from behind me, but I couldn't stop looking at him. I cocked my head to the left and looked confused. Then, two white wings, each as long as Alic was tall, shot out of his shirt. It was so fast I didn't think I really saw it until I looked down and saw his legs dangling and his arms around me. And the school fading in the distance below. We were flying, and far, too. I noticed I wasn't holding on to anything and threw my arms around his neck. My eyes saw the school getting father and father away. A long with the parking lot. And then the city park. And the grocery store. Then we came over a forest and he started getting lower and lower until we were on the ground. I let go of him and sank into his arms, leaning my head on his chest. I tried to figure out what just happened.

At that moment I heard Ellie behind us say, jokingly, "Oh Alic. There you go again, ruining a perfectly good shirt! Ha!" then her voice changed and it sounded concerned, "What was that for anyway?"

He said, turning around, "For her."

I looked at Ellie and she looked completely shocked.

"Oh my," she gasped and didn't even finish.

* * *

please review? lol 


	5. Chapter 4

**hey guys! well even though i didn't want the chapter to end where it did thats ok bc i felt really bad that i hadn't updated lol! so here you guys go! sorry New Moon came in the mail and my birthday is tomorrow so yeah sorry you guys!**

**WATCH ME BLEED**

**keep it real**

**"C"-T-(R)**

**Baileyzzzzzzzzz**

Chapter Four

"Put her down, Alic," she said hanging her head. She ran her nimble, white fingers through her bleach blonde hair.

"I'm sorry Ellie…. But the tree, the tree was going to kill her," he said in my defense, standing in front of me.

"This is not ok Alic! What were you thinking! First of all you skip class to play in the _rain_. And then you use your powers in front of plenty of windows! I know she's pretty and nice, but you just can't pull stuff like this at school!" she yelled at him zooming up into his face. He didn't flinch.

"I would have done it for anyone, Eleleka," he said through clenched teeth. Her eyes widened as he said that name.

"Call me by my fill name eh? Well _Alexander_ I know you have this angel trip thing going on inside your head, but you can't listen to it. You just…. can't Alic. I'm sorry, but you just can't."

"Ellie, what happened to the joking 'Oh you ruined another shirt' thing?"

"No, just take us to her house Alic." And she put his arm around her waist. He turned to me, but I took a step back.

"What's going on?" I asked, my voice shaking.

"Get on his other arm, Zahrah." She seemed to be getting angrier as the moments passed.

I looked at Alic, who only looked upset. And slightly guilty. "Tell me," I whispered to him.

Ellie pulled away from him and moved her hand around the air on the right side of my head. Then cupped my face and stroked my face with her thumb. I was getting sleepy, my eye lids getting heavy. I started to fall to the ground, but Alexander caught me.

"Eleleka!" he said looking down at me with a frightened expression.

"She'll wake up in a few hours. Now take her home."

That was the last thing I heard before I drifted.

------------------------------

I woke to someone softly brushing hair away from my warm cheeks. All I could register was that I was under to covers of my bed. And the hand was warm and trembling.

"Zahrah….." a familiar voice whispered almost inaudibly.

I opened my eyes and stared back into the eyes of my two brothers, Zeke first and then Zac. Zac was standing behind Zeke, leaning toward me, while Zeke knelt beside my bed. His hand and voice had been the one to wake me.

My younger brother looked angry, immensely so. Zeke on the other hand look somewhat frightened, and concerned in that brotherly, protective way he always had with me.

I smiled at Zeke and then looked at Zac questioningly. What was wrong with him? Oh no, was he still mad about this morning?

He plopped down and sat on my bed. He turned his head completely away from me and crossed his arms across his chest. Zeke paid no attention to him, his eyes glued to my face.

"How are you feeling?" he whispered, soft and afraid, leaning down closer to me.

"I'm... fine? Should there be something wrong with me?" I answered. Besides the stiffness in my unmoving legs and a tiny crick in my neck I felt fine.

"They said you were really sick. That they had to get you home as fast as possible, they couldn't even let you see the school nurse first," he answered confused.

"Who's they?"

"Ellie and Alex, er… Alic… or something. The girl with the sweet car and her brother," he said looking at me with an expression as if I should know. "She said that you three were on the way class when you had to stop at the bathroom. She said that she waited for you outside the girl's room until she heard you… puking." He touched my hair and he looking scared again. "The dude wasn't far away and heard too. They rushed in and you were collapsed beside the toilet. Then they towed you to their car and you woke up then and told them where our house was. Ellie told the ladies at the front desk when she got back, that you were at home I mean."

During the beginning of this strange explanation Zac had stayed completely motionless. Them when Zeke spoke of puking he flinched, turning his head even farther away from me, like he was almost trying to do a 360 degree angle with his head . Then, again when Zeke spoke of them driving me home. He never turned to look at me though.

"Don't you remember anything at all, Z?" Zeke questioned, still looking intently on my face. "Then again maybe I shouldn't expect anything," he whispered to himself.

All I did was shake my head yes.

"How much do you remember?"

"Um…all of it." It sounded more like a question, but he bought it. I looked down and noticed the trash can among Zeke's feet.

"You're mouth must taste terrible… I'll go get you something to drink." He smiled down at me, stood up, and walked out. Zac finally turned to me, tears in his eyes.

I started to sit up, to reach for him, but he took my hands and eased them bad down to the bed. He scooted close to me and got in the same kneeling position Zeke had been in. "Zac…" I whispered.

"No. No I'm fine. At first I was scared, just like Zeke. He was shaking on the way home. Then I was angry, I was almost pissed." I turned my head to the side and looked up at him concerned still. He looked away from my eyes and above my head. He seemed to be fighting the tears again as he said, "And now I'm sad and scared again."

"Zac…" I sat up putting my feet on the ground on either side of his kneeling form and taking his face in hands. "Why are you sad? Why are you afraid, little bro?" I added with a smile.

"It's probably stupid, silly of me. I mean… you were only throwing up, it had probably just been something you ate." He looked down this time. "But I don't know, I was still really worried. And since what happened with mom... I just don't know Z, I'm sorry I'm such a flack," he said scoffing at the end. Even blushing a little under his browned skin.

I gave his head a little shake so he'd look at me. For the first time, in a long time, hearing about my mom didn't break me out into tears for myself. I didn't break out into tears at all. I did feel sad, but it wasn't because of her. No I felt sad for Zac, for worrying his already worried heart about me. About something that I was sure wasn't even true. Or was it? I was getting confused and tried to get back to the present. He was looking in my eyes, waiting to hear what I had to say.

"I so sorry I scared you Zac. And I know, I know about mom... and how hard it is-"

"You've been struggling a lot lately about her and I thought you were having such a rough time that your body was being affected," he confessed his eyes somewhat glassy again. "I didn't want you to feel so alone, being the only girl. I feel like we haven't talked- carefree, for real- in a long time." He had _my_ attention now. "And then I was angry. I thought you were faking and I was so angry that you would dare think you were the only one in pain. That you would draw attention to yourself just for the sake of getting attention. Then I was angry at them." It was strange, very strange, how his voice ripped out the mention of my new friends. Like his body had to say it, but did want to and couldn't.

"They'd taken you home without telling anyone. They'd just… taken it upon themselves to save the day or whatever. I don't know why but I didn't like it. I didn't like it at all.

"And so with that thought in my head I stalked in here, with Zeke a few feet in front of me and I looked down at your sleeping form. I can't explain why I was so upset. I didn't even want to look at you." He looked away from my face and down again. He began again whispering, "Then Zeke told you what happened. How you had hurled. I didn't have any hate, for anyone, anymore. All I wanted to do was help you. Even thank them for bringing you home when they didn't have to."

A hand landed on Zac's shoulder and I looked up and saw Zeke. I hadn't even heard him enter the room I was so involved in Zac's feelings.

"Yeah, so you pretty much scared us a lot, Zahrah," Zeke said in a light, yet meaningful tone. He handed me a sprite and I took a tiny sip, but still letting the taste touch my disgusted tongue. "And y'know what? I propose we don't even think about this around dad. Nothing happened, everyone's fine, so yeah; just don't bring it up, ok?" Zac and I nodded vigorously.

"How long was I out?" I asked when we had all made it down to the kitchen. I looked outside and it was dark.

"Well Ellie said that you left after lunch, which is around 12:30 and we came home after school, and we were both afraid to wake you up. Then 6 o'clock rolled around and neither of us could take it anymore. So from 12:30ish to 6," Zac explained staring at the table.

"Whoa. I really am sorry guys…" was all I could say.

"Sorry about what?" asked a male voice from behind me. My dad bent over and kissed the top of my head before I turned to look up at him. Both my brothers stared at the table.

"Oh nothing dad," I said smiling reassuringly.

"So what's on the menu?"

"Um…." I thought and realized I hadn't prepared anything. "How's pizza sound?" I said with an apologetic look on my face.

"Wonderful!" he said and walked to his room, humming all the way.

The boys looked up at me and all three of us rolled our eyes. We all leaned into the table, close so we could whisper.

"Do you think he suspects something?" I asked in hushed tones.

"Heck no, listen." And Zac pointed his thumb to dad's room behind him. And sure enough-

_"When you get caught _

_Between the moon and New York City! _

_I know its crazy, _

_But it's true"_

- he was singing. Off key I might add.

"Dad's lost his mind," Zeke said sending us all into a quiet fit of laughter. But in each of our minds, we knew he had. And, once more, we were all scared.

---------------

I was mesmerized by his sapphire blue eyes as he helped me up from the floor. Again.

"Some things never change, do they," he chuckled still holding onto my hand.

"Ha, uh yeah…" was all I sputtered out.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked letting go of my hand and turning to walk to the cafeteria.

"Better?" I snapped suddenly anxious.

"After throwing up, silly. Do you feel any better?" he said, his face gave nothing away.

I squinted up at him. "I never threw up," I said to him.

"Hmmm I guess you don't remember." He shrugged, looking forward.

I grabbed his arm tightly and made me look at me. "_What_ happened?" I growled at him.

"You were throwing up in the girl's bathroom, and in the back seat of my car," he growled back, making my attempt sound like a whimper.

I leaned back a bit, my breathe shaking in my chest. I hadn't let go of his arm when he yanked it back. My hand fell to my side and my eyes to the floor. He just continued walking, forgetting all about me.

When he got the end of the hallway he stopped at the door. He half turned to me but didn't look at me. He hung his head.

"I just…," he looked up at me, "I would tell you… I would. But I can't."-He looked away- "Even if you already know." He said this more to himself than to me. Alic disappeared into the roaring lunch room as I stood, unmoving, locked in place.

"Hey Zahrah! Feeling better?" I heard Ellie's light, yet concerned, voice come from behind me.

I turned to look at her, my brow scrunched into nervous, frightened wrinkles.

Maybe I had been sick…..  
**REVIEW OR DIE!**


	6. chapter 4cont

hey guys! i know,... i know i'm a very bad girl to make everyone wait sooooooo long for something soooooooooo short but yeah i've been sooo busy and my brain is going crazy lol! -coughstupidmelissacough- but i wrote this a few nights ago... and this is the end of chapter four so yeah i'll TRY TRY TRY to get working hard you guys!

WATCH ME BLEED

keep it real

"C"-T-(R)

Baileyzzzzzzz

* * *

Maybe I had been sick….. 

I walked into the cafeteria with her and we sat with Alic. He seemed normal, not cold, not hostile, not rude. Just his normal and kind self. There was, though, one moment when he shot me a glace that made me quake. The look lasted one nanosecond, but it felt like an eternity. He terrified me in that one moment. I wasn't afraid of the unknown, like I normally was, but horrified because I recognized him. Not him exactly, but he looked so much like someone I knew. And I couldn't put my finger on it…

-------------------------

I got home and couldn't so much as put one foot in front of the other. No one disagreed with the idea of me going to sleep and I was out the second my head hit the pillow. Then I had a dream.

_The house was empty. Either the setting sun or the rising moon caused my home to take a blue tint, the light casting long shadows across the walls and floors. The house was cold… The door to my room was the only one that was closed. I walked into my room and before I switched my light on I saw him sleeping on my bed. Alexander. My body filled with adrenaline. A new form I wasn't used to. I wanted to touch him, to run my fingers through his soft curls. I wanted him to touch me. I crept to my bed at an incredibly slow speed. I sat on the edge of the bed, but my hand hesitated beside his beautifully peaceful face. He shifted in his sleep and his cheek can full on with my hand. I couldn't help but stroke my thumb across the porcelain skin. He woke then, not startled, his eyes opening fine and regular. As though he had only blinked. I couldn't pull my hand back, I tried but I couldn't bring my body to do it. Then his hand reached up to cup my face. He began pulling me down to the bed and pushing himself up, so he was on top this time. The blue tint of the house changed, now it was warm, a soft, almost honey light filled the room. His body shielded over mine as I stared up into his blue eyes- his long black hair falling into his face- frightened and excited for what would come next. It was nothing major, only a soft kiss. Then he pulled away and looked at me once more. He took both sides of my face in his hands and kissed me harder, truer. The left hand moved to my neck while the right stayed put. He was truly kissing me now. Extremely passionate, and I felt as though I'd never used these lips correctly. He started to lay down more, his legs beside mine but his torso laying on top of me. He kissed me in earnest again and again. Then I felt something I hadn't in a long time. I felt whole, complete. His hand caressed my cheek and my neck. Then it moved to the back of my head, holding me to him in an iron grip. I pulled my lips from his so that they could move to his long neck, but he stopped me. He held my face down, firmly on the pillow and looked deep into my eyes. The room changed again, it was cold and blue. His face changed also. I don't mean the expression changed, I mean literally transformed into someone else's face. His hair got shorter, his nose a little longer, he looked _like_ Alic but it wasn't him. I felt a scream creeping up my torso to my throat but it was stuck there. The man laying with me now was the very man who stole my mother from me… This new man kissed me now but it was nothing like Alexander. No, this man did not complete me, he destroyed me. His kiss was not from a lover, but an outsider. It was hard and cold and lustful. Disgusting. This man was going to kill me…._

And I woke up, the scream still lodged in my throat.

----------------

review or die


	7. Authors Note 1

hi guys

i'm soooooooo sorry i haven't been on since LAST FREAKING YEAR! i feel terrible... life has been really stressful guys... y'know boys, friends, friends and their boys lol i hope you guys can understand and please know i will be back with an update that is a real chapter lol and soon

i love you guys

keep reading

keep reviewing

i'm so sorry

Baileyzzzzzzz


End file.
